What Happened in Heaven

Spoiler alert for supernatural season premiere!

...

Dean's working for Big G in the Sky. How did this come about? My personal theory, not meant to be sacrilegious or anything...but if the CW ever DID have a God character, it would be like this, and it would be played by Tom Hanks...Peter would be John Cusack. Actually, Woody Allen could play either role...


Peter: Umm, Lord, sir, I hate to bother you while you're, uh, being omniscient and all, but we're having a bit of a to-do in communications, I--
Lord: Lolz, I know everything, I'm the Lord. Calm down. There's this big rumour about the A--
Peter: Yes, umm. The Bad Day.
Lord: What, is it some kind of curse word now? I decide what those are.
Peter: Err, but. We just thought it would be better not to say it.
Lord: Say what?
Peter: Umm.
Lord: SAY WHAT, PETER.
Peter: A--Apocalypse, sir. The Apocalypse, apparently is coming, and maybe we're in for some--
Lord: Are you for real? Wtf happened to FAITH. I've got this under control.
Peter: No, no it's not that we don't think you know what you're doing...it's just. Well, you know. The guys in R&D have always had trouble with the whole Demon world thing and it's getting increasingly difficult to monitor their--
Lord: This is a bit of a sticky pickle, isn't it.
Peter: Maybe, sir, I think if you think we're in a-- uh.
Lord: Sticky pickle.
Peter: Right. Well, I don't think I could pull that off, but if you have a feeling we need to look into this, we had better get our on-earth defenses updated.
Lord: Hmm.
Peter: Well, you know, I mean--
Lord: Yes, in fact I do know, thanks. Sheesh. I'm thinking, aren't I?
John Winchester: If I may intercede--
Peter: How the H-- HOW did you get in here?
John: Lord, sir, if I may.
Lord: John, since you set up that poker league, things are getting a little out of control. Even for Heaven. I know you worked hard to get here, and Mary's been an angel, but--
John: Right, well, I'm going to work on that. But if I may, my son Dean--
Lord: HA. Your son Dean thinks religion is can be found in bottles, booty shorts, and Boston.
Peter: Sinful.
Lord: Well, no. Not really. When I wrote the Big Ten down they didn't HAVE booty shorts. So I guess that's fair game...back then it was all about the coveting. Anywho, John. Dean's a lost cause, my son. I send him a messenger and he's going to blame it on a hard night.
John: Actually, Dean's in Hell now.
Lord: ...'sat so? Huh. Well. THAT I can work with.